don't judge a pattern by its cover

This week's theme over at The Sew Weekly is all about attempting a pattern despite the heinous cover art on its package. Even if you don't sew, you've probably seen those pencil-sketch ladies sporting ridiculous fashions (especially if we're talking about the fashions of the 80's) in odd contortions on the envelopes in your granny's sewing room.

Just to prove my point...

Even the endorsement from Brooke Shields cannot hide the awfulness of this pattern cover. Bandeau tops with shoulder pads the size of small icebergs, paired with a giant bow on top of the head and two watches on the wrist. Two watches. I, for one, am heartily glad that this fashion era is far behind us. (I choose to ignore the reemergence of leggings that still lingers, clouding the common sense of many.)

Due to our imminent move, I haven't been participating in the weekly sewing challenges recently. Packing + Sewing + Bear Wrangling = Meningitis. Bad pattern covers ("when life gives you muumuus") were too good to pass up, so I posted a beauty leftover from my Grammy's stash. Even though I prefer to forget the fashion missteps of my youth (stirrup pants, anyone?), trust in Grammy to remind me of them. She dutifully wrote our names at the top of the pattern so that we would never, ever forget. At least I avoided the one-piece, velour, jumper-shorts combo. That was all Aunt Fyrne in Florida.

(someone please explain to me why the model's heads are so tiny)

Many sewing comments mentioned 70's fashion as the epitome of bad taste, but I have an unnatural fondness for the era. In fact, I found a couple pattern gems in men's 70's shirts straight from episodes of The Brady Bunch. Mustaches and giant dark sunglasses abounded. (I would have posted the picture but I can't find the patterns. They got swept up in the general packing and probably won't be unearthed for months and months.) I laughed so hard over the pattern envelope that I had to call up my friend, Kitty, to exclaim over the find. He replied that during his wayward youth he had specifically asked his mother to sew him a leisure suit. In lemon yellow. (His brother's matching leisure suit was powder blue.) Now if only I could get my hands on that little piece of history.

Comments

[Rebecca]

I love my 70's patterns! The 80's though......(urp). I think whatever you were wearing in the cafeteria in 8th grade haunts you-and not in a good way-until you die.

[Janet]

Check out Brooke's eyebrows too. Do they go with the shoulder pads? So many fashion changes!

[Amy O]

Yep, I have a dear male friend named Kitty. Our favorite phrase is, "mess with the Kitty, feel the claws." Words to live by.

[margo]

oh how funny! I want to go through all my patterns now for yuks.

(and distracted: you have a male friend called "Kitty"???!)

[www.google.com/accounts/o8/id?id=AItOawmi-8ETIFOxCUAI2B2MmD0zC4InEyhppMY]

I have in my supplies a new package of generous shoulder pads should you decide to make yourself a large dress with huge shoulder pads and puffed sleeves for Easter. Remember that the horror of yesteryear is tomorrow's cool vintage. L.B. will probably adore a velour jump suit.

[Anne]

That first Brooke Shields-endorsed pattern pretty much sums up my wardrobe in high school.

[PartyMom]

Oh the fashion mishaps of the 80s...I too was a stirrup pants victim. *horror*

Hope the packing is going well!